Welcome, you grounded legends, to a sidesplitting tour of Trump Derangement Syndrome (TDS). TDS is a fake “condition” so absurd it’s practically a comedy special. Research says it’s not in the DSM-5, just a satirical jab at folks who lose their marbles over Donald Trump, per Psychology Today.
If you’ve got common sense—congratulations!—prepare to cackle at these symptoms of the Trump-obsessed.
Outrage Overload: The Screaming Starts
TDS kicks off with outrage so intense it’s like a volcano erupting over a misspelled tweet. “HE BREATHED TODAY—FASCIST!” shrieks Karen, as if Trump’s mere existence is a crime against humanity, per CNN Politics.
It’s a tantrum on steroids, hilarious to watch. They’re red-faced over his breakfast choice. Normal folks just sip coffee and move on.
Conspiracy Conundrum: Tin Foil Hats On
Next, TDSers dive into conspiracies wilder than a sci-fi flick—Trump’s a Russian spy, a coup mastermind, and probably faked the moon landing too. Wikipedia notes they see Putin in every shadow, convinced his every golf swing hides a secret code.
It’s a live-action thriller starring Trump as the villain. They’ll swear his hamburger order signals the Kremlin. The X-Files called—they want their plot back.
Memory Malfunction: History Who?
TDS wipes their memory cleaner than a hard drive crash—politicians have been sleazy forever, but Trump’s the only bad guy they recall. CNN Politics traces this back to Bush and Obama derangement, yet TDSers act like he invented scandal, ignoring Clinton’s cigar escapades.
It’s a selective amnesia that’s pure comedy gold. Mention Watergate, and they blink. Trump’s the sole star of their scandal show.
Personalization Pitfall: It’s All About Me
Everything Trump does feels like a personal attack to TDSers—he mocks “Sleepy Joe,” and they’re sobbing, “He’s mocking ME!” Salon.com calls it a cultural quirk, but they take his steak preference as a jab at their veganism.
It’s narcissism dialed to eleven. A tax cut? Clearly aimed at their yoga budget.
Obsessive Compulsion: Trump 24/7
TDSers can’t stop—Trump’s in their head rent-free, fueling endless X rants and meme floods, per Know Your Meme. They’re refreshing Truth Social like it’s a job, hunting for outrage bait while normal folks watch cat videos.
It’s a full-time gig with no 401(k). Their feed’s a Trump shrine—ironic, right? They’re obsessed with hating him.
Virtue Signaling Vortex: Look at Me!
They strut their anti-Trump cred like it’s a Nobel Prize—Resist tees, protest selfies, the works, as Salon.com notes. “I’m fighting tyranny!” they post, as if yelling at a MAGA hat saves democracy.
It’s performative outrage at its finest. They’re heroes in their own minds. The rest of us just see loud peacocks.
Humor Black Hole: No Laughs Allowed
TDS sucks the fun out of everything—Trump’s gaffes are comedy gold, but they see only doom, per Psychology Today. “Covfefe” isn’t funny; it’s a “threat to civilization!”
It’s a tragedy wrapped in hilarity. They miss the punchline every time. Life’s too short not to laugh at “bigly.”
Blind Loyalty: Anti-Trump at All Costs
Finally, TDSers back anything anti-Trump, even if it’s nuts—some rando opposes him, and they’re all in, per Wikipedia. They’d cheer a toaster if it ran against him, logic be damned.
It’s loyalty so blind it’s comical. Principles? Traded for a “Resist” bumper sticker.
The Common Sense Take: It’s a Circus
These symptoms scream cultural phenomenon, not mental illness—polarization on steroids, says Salon.com. Trump’s a loudmouth lightning rod, but TDSers zap themselves daily.
It’s a self-inflicted farce we can’t look away from. They’re the clowns, and we’ve got the popcorn. The show’s free—enjoy it.
Cultural Fallout: X Marks the Spot
X is TDS central—blue checks rage-tweet while the sane scroll past, per Know Your Meme. “He’s orange!” they howl, as if it’s news, not a tan gone wrong.
It’s a digital dumpster fire of derangement. The platform’s their stage. We’re just here for the lolz.
Media Madness: Feeding the Beast
Cable news pumps TDS like it’s oxygen—CNN Politics says they thrive on the chaos. “TRUMP ATE A BURGER—IS HE GASLIGHTING US?” screeches a pundit, and TDSers lap it up.
It’s a ratings racket, not a cure. They’re hooked on the screamfest. Normalcy’s not an option.
The Verdict: Laugh It Off
So, TDS symptoms—outrage, conspiracies, obsession—are a riot for anyone with a grip, per Psychology Today. Trump’s a cartoon; they’re the punchline, losing it over a guy who’d rather golf than rule their world.
Common sense wins—grab a snack and enjoy the meltdown.
They’ll never get the joke. We’re laughing anyway. Sanity’s the real prize here.